Making Success Easy and Failure Impossible with Michael Bernoff
Golf is a notoriously difficult and frustrating sport. It's easy to get stuck in mediocrity, hitting shot after wayward shot while your score balloons. But it doesn't have to be this way!
Michael Bernoff, founder of the Average Sucks brand and the Human Communications Institute, joins Tori on the T-Time podcast to draw a roadmap to take our golf game from average to exceptional.
The Key Mindsets of Winners
Bernoff boils down the difference between lackluster leisure golfers and fiercely competitive players into a simple but profound dichotomy:
"Winning has more to do with state of mind than an actual occasion. We want to make success easy and failure impossible."
This gaping mental divide is at the heart of elevating beyond being just an average golfer towards becoming an exceptional one.
The exceptional golfer embodies critical mindsets that the average golfer does not:
- Self-belief - The unshakable confidence that you can and will play your best.
- Intentionality - Every shot, strategy and practice session has purpose behind it.
- Competitiveness - You don't just play golf, you compete.
Cultivating these mindsets lays the foundation. But we must build upon them with other mental shifts...
From Committed to Competitor
Many golfers claim they are "committed" to improving. But Bernoff explains the critical difference between commitment and becoming a true competitor:
"Being fully committed to your game is not gonna get you better. Being fully committed will get you about as good as you are. It'll get you what your average is in life."
Competitors do not just try harder. They strategically tackle their weak areas, study better players, and do what it takes to elevate their game.
This begins by transitioning from just being a "player" to becoming a "competitor". As Bernoff says:
"We gotta decide that we're gonna be a competitive golfer. That is a big decision we make."
The Building Blocks of Exceptional Golf
We all want the quick fix to shoot lower scores. But holistic, long-term improvement requires patience and focusing on the fundamentals.
When asked what every golfer needs to work on, Bernoff highlighted:
- Short game - Mastering chips, pitches, bunker shots and putts.
- Course management - Making smart decisions and executing each hole strategically.
- Mindset - Developing mental toughness and competitive spirit.
Bernoff urges golfers to resist overhauling everything at once. Instead, devote yourself to incrementally improving these three building blocks:
"If you literally worked on those three very basic things for 90 days, how would that improve a golfer?"
The answer is clear - monumental improvement awaits.
Small Gains, Major Results
Golfers often swing for the fences, trying to completely transform their game overnight. But Bernoff explains how marginal improvements in the right areas can catalyze breakthroughs:
"If you looked at those three areas and worked on them...if each of those things went up 1 or 2%, how would that impact our game overall?"
A gain of just a few percentage points may seem tiny. But honing your short game, course management and mindset unlocks exponential results.
This emerges from the "aggregation of marginal gains" principle that propelled Britain's cycling team to multiple gold medals. Tiny improvements eventually compound into massive success.
Play More Often Than Not
Such marginal gains do not fall in your lap. As Bernoff explains, you must commit to steady practice:
"If you will literally do these things more often than not, which means 3-4 days a week...that's where we create the win."
This contrasts with the common myth that simply playing more golf automatically improves your skill. As Bernoff clarifies:
"I don't believe making more calls makes you a better salesperson...I believe the more times you play golf, the more comfortable you get with it, the more relaxed your game is."
The key is not just quantity of play, but quality focused practice.
From Current Reality to True Potential
Our self-limiting beliefs restrain us from what we could truly accomplish. As Bernoff explains:
"We look at things from our own current reality. It's no different than people buying something...we don't realize we're going to make more money down the road."
We falsely assume our potential aligns with our average right now. But when we shift perspective towards our latent talent, everything changes.
First, recognize your current reality to determine where you need improvement. But then compare yourself to those at the elite level you aspire towards.
This expands your sense of what's possible, helping you set bolder outcomes to stretch your potential even further.
Accept the Consequences of Success
As your golf skill grows, others may react negatively rather than celebrate your wins. Bernoff warns about these consequences in advance so they do not become obstacles:
"People are gonna want your picture...They're gonna want to know how well you're doing...We've gotta decide in advance going into this that our identity of how we identify ourselves is, do we want to be a competitor?"
By embracing the competitor identity fully, external criticism no longer deters your internal drive to excel.
From Golfer to Winner
Bernoff reveals that becoming an exceptional golfer requires first transforming into an exceptional person.
The key is elevating golf higher in your personal value hierarchy and allowing your identity to shift not just to a skilled golfer, but to a winner.
As Bernoff concludes:
"It isn't about having to work harder. It's really switching that identity...I believe the biggest challenge is that we have, our lives are really set up in a way that we we're, we're seen by people a certain way. And we've gotta get comfortable with something interesting. Like how uncomfortable is it if you woke up tomorrow and you were a better golfer?"
Once you grow comfortable as a winner who plays exceptional golf, mediocrity becomes impossible. You enter a self-perpetuating cycle where success builds upon success.
Average sucks. Exceptional is everything. As Bernoff says, it's time to:
"Make success easy and failure impossible."
Additional Insights from Michael Bernoff
While the core concepts above are critical, Bernoff shares countless other insights to help golfers transform their mindsets and skills. Here is a summary of some of his top wisdom nuggets:
On redefining "winning" in golf:
- Winning has multiple meanings - first place, beating your handicap, no blowup holes, etc.
- Use "or" instead of "and" when defining wins to provide more options.
- Make failure impossible - e.g. not even trying for 10 years. Then success is easy!
On goals vs outcomes:
- Most goals fail because they have too many "ands" that all must go right.
- Focus instead on your desired "outcome" - where do you want to end up?
On working smarter, not just harder:
- Don't just work on what you're already good at. Improve weaknesses to elevate everything.
- Use a circle chart to track progress on your short game, mindset and course management.
On getting comfortable with success:
- Prepare for reactions, criticism, and expectations from others as you get better.
- Fully commit to your identity as a competitor and winner.
On your true potential:
- Compare your skill level to your true potential ceiling rather than your current reality.
- What we believe we're capable of directly impacts our outcomes.
On values, confidence and skill development:
- Place higher priority on golf within your value hierarchy.
- Develop core skills like balance, breathing, coordination that translate into better golf.
- Build confidence as a competitor willing to do what it takes to win.
Bernoff masterfully shifts golfers away from unproductive mindsets towards empowering mental models for growth. By adopting his wisdom, we transform frustrations into victories.
The path from average to exceptional begins in the mind. Will you walk it?
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